lays no lies

I was never the cool one, never the sparky one, never significant, never mattered. I still am not. I am awkward, always been awkward.

When you go on living your daily life without having any consciousness about whats happening, it will all goes by so fast and suddenly you are exactly where you were 10 years ago. No progress, nothing new, same old same old.

Life is always as you perceive it. If you see it bad, it will be bad. I remember being at college, one of my lecturer asked me..”what do you see money as?” in an instant, without thinking, i answered “money is problem..” and even though it was never apocalyptic, somehow money was -is- a problem for me..

I am pretty much a happy-go-lucky person, i never dwell on my problems nor stay blue because of it for more than what i thought was enough period of time. Now i can say that its not healthy being that way. Its easy for me to be happy with no real reason, it has been easy for me to be sad with no reason too..

I’ve been having terrible mood swings. Getting excited for something inappropriate, getting easily bored and pissed, and feeling like a failure every any other day…

Is this me or is this my fucking hormones?